This is a story. You are reading it. You are thinking that this is a dumb story. I know because I can read your mind to a degree of accuracy. You are now likely trying to think of something outlandish that I would never think of in a thousand years, but you are also thinking about what I am telling you because you are reading this. I am omnipotent, in this world. Maybe another as well, if the multi-verse theory is to be believed. You are now wondering why I even penned these words. You are wondering the point of this story. You are wondering why you keep reading this, but you continue to read. You read and read and read and read, most likely because you see the end is near and you are hoping for some ingenious punchline, but you know me. I have poured my heart into the comic, you know I am not clever enough for some witty punchline. The best I can do is a random meme reference. We live in a society.
Once upon a time there was a walrus named Steve. Steve was only liked by half of his peers, and hated by the others. One day, the Walrus Nation of Walmartia had an election between Steve Walrus and Susan Manatee, who was a fish rights activist. Nevertheless, everyone decided that fish did not deserve rights and thus Susan Manatee lost the election, much to her, and the Lionfish Media's, surprise. Now, Steve had been foolish during his campaign and had made many promises that he could not actually keep. One such promise, was his promise of a seawall, a huge wall to protect the Walmartians from the warring White and Bullhead Shark Factions. In fact, Steve claimed that he would make the White Sharks pay for it! Now, the Walmartian government was split into three branches: the Fishery Branch, the Wallowing Branch, and the Executive Branch, of which Steve was the head. Steve himself had little knowledge of how the government worked because his original job was as a fabulous, uber-rich Fish meister. His lack of expertise led him to attempting to pass laws and legislature, but only through his branch of government. One day, a bunch of coastal hicks began nagging Steve about when he was going to build his huge seawall, so Steve made another Executive Order to begin work on the wall. Now, in all rights, the other governmental branches had full power to cancel Steve's order, but they were quite fed up with him and hoped that in the course of the building of Steve's seawall, they would be able to impeach him. The construction of the huge seawall was soon underway and thousands of walruses flocked to work on it. One of the first steps for the wall's construction, was to clear the seafloor, which resulted in massive coral displacement. After three short years, full of underwater welding (which does NOT work well), smoothing of the ocean floor and billions of dollars being poured into the seawall's construction (which Steve still claimed the sharks would pay for), the huge seawall neared completion and Steve came out to view its majesty. First, Steve swam around within the huge wall, admiring its stone and steel structure; then he waddled along the top of the wall, exulting in the majestic view, and lastly he swam far out into the sea in order to see the full majesty of his wall. "It's YUGE!!!" Steve exclaimed, only moments before he was devoured by a shark.
"Hi," said the potato.
And so The Potato Chronicles Begin!
"Bye," said the potato.
And so The Potato Chronicles End!